To move back home or not to move back home!?
q u e s t i o n: Hi Jen! About 2 years ago I graduated college and landed a job that took me a little ways away from my family. At first everything was great, I met a guy, my job was going good, I adopted a kitten. But in the past few months things have not been as good. My boyfriend is not the greatest, I love him but he just tends to really annoy me. He has basically moved into my apartment without asking and doesn't do anything to help financially or cleaning-wise.
My job is not that great anymore, I'm finding it boring and lonely and I haven't received the raise I was promised months ago. I never really made friends when I moved here since I met my boyfriend right away. My parents suggested I just pack up and move home, but does that make me look like a failure? Like I'm just running home to mommy and daddy to fix everything? I do believe I will be happier there but should I forgo this life I've built here just because things are a little rough? Just looking for some advice. Thanks so much! XO
Hey ****!
Hmm so the bottom line is you're not happy with your current situation, and you need to make changes asap. That's what we do know! Life's too short to be unhappy with your work, relationships, location... anything, really.
Whether or not you'll be happier back home is something you need to decide for yourself... but I certainly wouldn't worry about that "looking" like a failure if moving back home is something that's ultimately best for you. Never let the fear of outside opinions sway a decision like that!
HOWEVER, if I were you, I'd probably give it some time with where you're at. Making big life decisions when you're at a "low point" usually isn't best, because you'll always gravitate towards what's comforting and easy.
When things are tough, as cheesy as it sounds, this is PRIME TIME to grow as a person. It's a blessing, really.
"Comfort zones are great, but nothing ever grows there" -IDK
Eliminate what's not adding to your life over there -AKA ditch the sh*tty boyfriend- and start adding real value. Get out and mingle after work! Join a club or a gym, something community based. Find some new girlfriends. (Bumble for "friends" is a thing, just sayinnn) Do what you need to do to make it more enjoyable living there! As far as your career... if you're unhappy with it, do something about it--talk to your boss about your concerns and see if change is possible, if not... start looking elsewhere.
Allow yourself some time to get through this ugly "rough patch"... and once you're out of it, you may find that you love your new and improved life there. You also may meet a cutie in your new circle of friends -- one that actually enjoys helping out ;)
If all else fails, home is always an option. Your family isn't going anywhere! But first, use this time to your advantage and challenge yourself. You may be surprised at the benefits :)
I hope this helps a bit... keep me updated!
Your friend,
Jen xx